When nine years ago I started my journey of discovering the real me I had now idea what I was getting into. I just knew that it was the only way to move forward and live. And you know, typically when we go on a journey, we expect there to be a destination. My destination was going to be the real me. That is what I was traveling towards because once I discovered the real me, I would be free. I did not know that this was going to be a journey to last a lifetime. At that point I honestly still thought that there would be an end point to it, that there would come a time when I would say "Ok, I know who I am and I have left all my demons and limiting beliefs behind me". Well. I can tell you right away that that is not how it goes. I have done lots and lots of deep work, exploring the caves of my soul, of my being and I have transformed many stories and beliefs that were holding me back. And all that work has given me a pretty good idea of the real me. I see her, I feel her, I hear her. Sometimes she is right there with me and sometimes she runs off to a deeper part of the cave, inviting me to explore a little more. She is beautiful and free. She is fearless and loving. She is pure magic. And when she is right there with me I feel like I can conquer the world. The times where she runs off and invites me to go deeper, I feel helpless and confused. I feel like I have not accomplished anything because again I have to take that first step of going into an unknown part of the cave and explore. But then she whispers to me "it's OK to be afraid, just come and hold my hand." And then I know that it is never about starting over again or about accomplishments, it is about expanding and growing. Our journey is meant to lead us deeper and deeper into magnificence and it is endless because our magnificence is limitless.
Working through the complicated and beautiful layers of our humanness is a journey that demands courage, honesty and commitment. And sometimes, yes, I get tired of exploring the caves and I wonder where on earth I am going. I just want to rest and stay where I am. But then I realize that staying where I am is denying myself an even more magnificent experience. Because each chamber of the cave holds precious treasures and the more I explore, the more gifts I discover. Are you ready to go and explore the caves of your essence?